I played mouthwash where they had a sentence that went like "The bad thing that happend doesn't define you as a person" but I don't know. I don't understand how people can think like that, why is stealing okay? Why is hurting people okay? Is it to make you feel better, but how. How do you find pleasure in that.

I have an ex who wanted to have sex with me and even though I said no he would find a way for me to pleasure him. Forcing me drunk and talking me into the fact I should give him head, being mad at me if I didn't and one time trying to force me into having sex with him. Mulitple times he tried but it always ended up with me crying and him getting annoyed and trying to gaslight me into that he didn 't try anything and that I was the one moving. I don't understand why he did that and it still gives me trauma flashbacks. I don't understand what I did wrong for him to never see me as a child who was 15 and confused to why it was a top priority for everyone to have sex.